The Little Girl That Changed My Life

Have you ever opened your mouth to talk to God, but could not form the words to begin your prayer?

Maybe you've walked through a dark valley even recently, feeling as if there was no light at the end of the tunnel. I'm sure most of you reading this have experienced a comparable feeling of emptiness where you simply don't have adequate words to approach the throne of grace boldly as we've been commanded in the book of Hebrews. For my wife Abby and I, this was a place we came to behold along the difficult journey of our first pregnancy that came to a close much quicker than any parents would expect or hope for.

Our daughter, Adalee, was expected to arrive on November 2nd, and unfortunately, she came 3 months sooner. After 7 months of unexpected doctor visits, and a series of heartbreaking news, Abby gave birth to our first child on August 18th that died in her womb. Adalee was a sick little girl and had fought hard to survive for a long 7 months. We held our 13-ounce baby in our hands that morning with tears streaming down our face knowing that we would be returning home without our baby girl. Watching my wife go through the process of pregnancy while knowing time was not in our favor was painful to endure, and holding our lifeless daughter for the first and last time brought a heartbreak that we will never forget. It's the type of emotion you cannot explain that leaves your heart empty, realizing your first child never had a chance to experience life on this side of eternity. After coming out on the other side and turning the page of life to a new chapter, everything from that moment forward has provoked a fresh perspective in us that has caused us both to view the world through a different lens.

The Apostle Paul says in 1st Corinthians 13:9,

"For we know in part and we prophesy in part."

In other words, Paul is encouraging the believers to understand no one understands the totality of God's ultimate purpose. The journey of following God is a mystery. You cannot be fully given to God without embracing the absolute fact that some things in life will never be fully understood. That is why King Solomon, in his incomparable wisdom, instructs us to "trust in the Lord with all of our hearts and lean not on our understanding, but in all our ways acknowledge God and He will direct our paths." That verse has always been a cute verse I memorized in children's church until I walked out of the hospital room that day with a resounding question alarming in my brain, "Why did this happen?" All of a sudden something that I had memorized became tangible, to the degree that I hung on to the words of Solomon for dear life, knowing I would never fully have the answer to my question. Although my hope and confidence can be anchored in the reality that I do not have to rely on my understanding, rather I can make a conscious decision to place my trust in the one who knows it all.

A principle that is essential for us to understand is, the fire does not come to bring harm, it rather comes to refine us and bring us forth as gold. God is building and maturing us from the inside out. The fire purifies us and expands our capacity to carry the promises of God that He fully intends to fulfill. According to Colossians 3:15, it is a mandate of the believer to allow peace to rule in our hearts. The Holy Spirit doesn't just grant us peace when we request it, He is peace. God does not want to simply reward you with peace amid the fire, He desires for us to live from peace with a continual awareness of His presence every single day of our lives. He is the friend that sticks closer than a brother and will be with you in the deepest darkest places of our lives. You can say yes to an ever-increasing friendship with Him today, and watch your life ascend from glory to glory!

I'm learning that life is full of decisions. Some are easy to make, and some are not so easy. The decisions you make today will drastically affect how tomorrow will look. The concept of punishment was abolished when the new covenant was established, and Jesus shed His blood as the ultimate price for our sins. Although what stands true today, is the law of sowing and reaping. There will always be consequences for the choices we make. This principle remains through the completion of the New Testament and established a more excellent way for the sin nature we were all born into. This reality has stood at my front door every day after we released our precious baby girl to the Lord. When the tears begin to flow and I'm lifting my complaint to God because sometimes life is just flat out hard, I have a choice to make. I can choose to wallow in disappointment or move forward with the promises of God written on my heart. Disappointment is a matter of fact, discouragement is a decision we get to make. One is inevitable, one is left up to us. God never promised us a life without hardship, but He did promise to never leave us. Circumstances will come and go and there is no way to avoid difficult seasons. The great thing is sooner or later, through choosing the superior reality, one outweighs the other.

Maybe you are reading this and you find yourself in a similar place in life today. Don't worry, you're a friend of the Father, and you do not have to carry your burdens alone. Psalm 68:19 tells us that,

"God our Savior, daily bears our burdens."

The battle will never be yours to fight, and He wants to fight it for you. I want to give you three quick ways to overcome challenging times that I have come to embrace in my own life:

1. Focus on things you can control. Only 12% of the things we worry about actually come to pass. Allowing these things to control our minds is exhausting, and will lead to anxiety. Have a singular focus and keep your eyes locked on Jesus.

2. Transform your mind through the continual reading, meditation, and application of God's word. When you do, get ready for God to speak! This is where our inner confidence comes in. Set your mind on the heavenly realm with the right perspective. If God said it, it shall come to pass!

3. Cancel out distractions and negativity. Be mindful of what you're taking in. Surround yourself with prayer warriors. There can only be room in your circle for life speaking individuals who desire to see you walking in breakthrough. Find 2 or 3 people to agree with you in faith through prayer and engage in intercession daily.